Resilience Coaching – Soft Skills for Tough Times
Soft Skills for Tough Times
How is it that some people seem to be able to face challenges head on and bounce back from adversity, while others quickly fold under pressure and find it hard to pick themselves up off the floor?
To develop and be successful as human beings, we need to be able to cope with adversity, to thrive on challenge and to remain optimistic and resourceful whatever the circumstances. Resilience theory takes the view that coping with risk and adversity are good for us, in fact going through the tough times actually helps us be more resilient.
The good news is you don’t have to expose yourself to an endless stream of challenges or tough situations. The skills that create resilience can be learnt and can be readily acquired through working with a professional coach.
Research
A 40-year study of 700 mainly disadvantaged Hawaiians (1954) Werner and Smith found that 1 in 10 developed into – “competent and autonomous young adults who ‘worked well, played well, loved well, and expected well.’ ”
They did so because they had an active approach to problem solving; a tendency to perceive their experiences in a positive light; an ability to gain positive attention from others and strong social support.
In the 1970s/80s, Maddi and Kobasa researched 450 Illinois Bell Telephone managers going through the trauma of industry deregulation. Two-thirds of the group fell apart – heart attacks, depression, anxiety, alcoholism, divorce. The other third not only survived but actually thrived.
They demonstrated a commitment to what they were doing, enthusiasm for challenge and a strong sense of control over their lives.
The study of resilience has continued to grow in the last few decades accompanied with a heightened recognition of its relevance not only to wellbeing but also for business success.
Resilient people are “more Innovative, better problem solvers, more successful & earn more money “ (Paul C Stoltz’s 1997)
Seven Abilities of Resilient People
Dr Karen Reivich, co-author of The Optimistic Child, with Professor Martin Seligman, and co-author of the Resilience Factor has identified seven learnable skills that create resilient ability.
1. Emotional awareness or regulation
The ability to identify what you are feeling and when necessary, the ability to control those feelings.
2. Impulse control
Highly resilient people are able to tolerate ambiguity so they don’t rush to make decisions. They sit back and look at things in a thoughtful way before acting.
3. Optimism
For optimism to help resilience it needs to be ‘realistic optimism’ and to be ‘wed to reality’. People, who are blindly optimistic, do not have optimism which facilitates problem solving: in fact it interferes with it.
4. Causal analysis
This means the ability to think comprehensively about the problems you confront. Being able to look at problems from many perspectives and consider many factors.
5. Empathy
The ability to read and understand the emotions of others is very important as it helps build relationships with others that provide vital social support in return.
6. Self-efficacy
Confidence in your ability to solve problems, knowing your strengths and weaknesses and relying on your strengths to cope.
7. Reaching out
People who score high on resilience are willing to try things and take risks. They view failure as a part of life.
To increase resilience people simply need to reflect on the above characteristics and skills and identify areas for development. Working with a professional coach will help develop insight into barriers and identify personalised strategies and action steps to build resilience.
Remember – “Resilience is more than just coping; that’s keeping your head above water. Being resilient means being able to walk out of the water.” – Larry Mallek
Association for Coaching Ireland’s 2nd International Conference – “Breaking the Mould” will be taking place in Dublin on 1st April 2011, to book your place today please click on the following link: AC Ireland 2011
Coaches of all disciplines and Corporate and academic organisations developing coaching capability will be challenged to step up and step away from the tried and tested models. They will be invited to take risks, to stretch, to innovate – all critical factors in building resilience to thrive in challenging times.
Thank you to the Centre for Confidence.co.uk
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